


Heaven Can Be So Boring

by writesstuff



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Demon!Stiles, F/M, M/M, Smut, angel!derek, bottom!Derek, sort of canon but mostly not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-03
Updated: 2012-09-26
Packaged: 2017-11-13 11:27:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/503026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writesstuff/pseuds/writesstuff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Demon!Stiles and Angel!Derek.</p><p>Except Derek's not so much an angel anymore, and Stiles...Stiles isn't a great demon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles is a demon who likes to hang out at the pearly gates. Derek's punishment for losing track of an angel in training is guarding said gates. Stiles finds his amusement in Derek.

“You know, being an angel can be _so_ boring,” he crooned as he traced fingers along gray wings.

The angel’s wings twitched but he made no move to shy away from the contact.

“I mean, just sitting up here in the clouds all day?” the boy tsk’d as he played with the hem of his shirt. It was splattered with red, reminding the angel of blood and he made a face before staring straight ahead again. “I mean, do you ever let your hair down and go to earth?” he grinned, all gleaming teeth as he leaned forward. “Had some sinful fun?” he whispered that, almost conspiratorial.  “Ever get that urge, Derek?”

Derek’s jaw twitched. “Once, but the poisonous scum had to die.” His smile was sarcastic, “You know how it is, _Stiles_.”

“Ah, Kate was such an asset. Great in the torture chamber, you know?” Stiles tsk’d. He splayed his fingers and waved his arms. “No worries—plenty more demons after her, no harm, no foul,” he added, leaning far too close for Derek’s comfort. Stiles grinned.

Derek gritted his teeth. “Give me one reason not to smite you, right now?”

“I’m not causing you any harm?” Stiles tried, smiling sweetly. Well, as sweetly as a demon could. “When you smite someone, is it smited, or smote?” he leaned back on his hands, staring at the blue sky. He wasn’t allowed in heaven, but the pearly gates had the best view, and he couldn’t help wanting to be as close to his parents as he could. Even with the ache in his non-existent heart, he knew they were here. He stared at the gates with a blank look. He’d made a deal a long while back. Far too long for the humans of today to remember. Call him a sentimental, but he liked to visit the mother he saved with his deal, and the father who didn’t quite know why his son died only a year after his wife got better.

Derek remained silent.

Stiles prodded him again. “What did you do to be stuck with gate duty?” he asked with a grin on his face.

Derek glared at him but answered, nonetheless. “Isaac was under my watch. He slipped away and went to earth.”

“Ah, how is baby angel?” Stiles asked, leaning forward again with a wicked grin on his face. “He’s lucky no one was nearby,” he added, eyebrows rising.

Derek clenched his jaw. “He’s fine.”

Stiles beamed, concluded he’d done a job well done, what with getting the usually stony angel to say more than two words to him. “Well, I really must go—people to torture, deals to make, etcetera!” he was just about to leave, when Derek stopped him.

“What kind of demon _are_ you?”

Stiles winked, “I’m a jack of all trades, my dear, sweet, angel-faced love.”

Derek glared at him for the endearments, but Stiles was already gone.


	2. Chapter 2

Stiles remembers his deal like it was yesterday. He tells Derek as such one day, while they’re both at the gate. Derek glares and tells him it was Allison’s fault this time, that he was even there, and to not bother him. Stiles ploughs on, because let’s face it—he likes the sound of his own voice.

“I remember my deal—how I felt, how it looked out on that crossroads, all those things,” he said as he sprawled out at Derek’s feet. “See, my mom was dying—cancer—and I heard of these deals from other people around my village. They said red eyed demons were the cause, and told me how to do it—mind, I had to ply them with a full week’s salary—I was a blacksmith, _shocking_ I know—in alcohol to do it-.” Derek made a noise in the back of his throat. “I know! Anyways, after all that, I took my box, buried it, and waited.”

Derek looked down at him, eyebrow raised.

“This guy shows up-.”

“They’re supposed to show you what you desire in a person.”

“Well, I know that _now_ , thanks,” Stiles stuck his tongue out at Derek. “But anyways, he shows up, and he’s spewing all these things about fame and fortune, and how he could kill me in an instant, but he likes me, and all this crap that I know was true, but wasn’t, and I’m actually his boss now—funny, isn’t it?”

Derek made a sound but went back to staring straight ahead.

“Yeah, so he’s saying he can’t help, nor does he want to—Lord knows why,” Stiles played with the hem of his shirt. “I told him I didn’t want ten years; I would even just go straight to hell if it meant that she’d get better.”

“And he took that?”

“Well, I had to sweeten the deal, say I’d become a protégé of his, and whatnot—I mean, they were looking for more demons back then.” Derek gave him a raised eyebrow. “Hey, I was smarter than the average person, okay! I knew—well, I didn’t _know_ , that’d be skeevy to know, but I had an idea of how hell would be—a lot of people did—fire, torture—all that.” He waved a hand. “I mean it’s more cold, than fiery pit of hell, but anyways…I just made it so that I wouldn’t end up being tortured just because I sold my soul.”

“Smart.” Derek rolled his eyes.

“Right?” Stiles nodded. “So yeah, back to the story.” He sat up and turned to face Derek, all the while crossing his legs. “It was the wee hours of the morn—he had shown up, spewed his spiel of how he was awesome and how I was a pathetic human. I was cold, only wearing long johns with my trousers, and a wool sweater—it was winter, and let me tell you—make your deals in the summer! The ground was hard as hell to dig up.” Derek rolled his eyes. “Anyways, after he declined helping me, I kind of _begged_ —it was pathetic, but I begged, got on my knees and everything, and told him I’d give him my soul right then and there if he just made her better.”

He made his voice deeper, as he mocked the demon, “ _I like you, kid, I’ll give you a year, but you’ll have to become a demon for me, deal?_ and then he kissed me, and that opened a whole new can of worms, because wow I was at least bisexual—though at the time I was thinking _I’m going to hell because I’m gay, great_.”

“You don’t actually-.”

“I know that _now_ , Derek. Thanks.”

Derek held back the eye roll, because it was just getting redundant now.

“After that, my mom got better, my dad was ecstatic, and none the wiser to my deal, and then my year was up, and let me tell you—that year was _awesome_. I did all these different things—I _travelled_ , it was a great year, and then the hell hounds came,” he shuddered. “I mean, they didn’t drag me back because I willingly went, and the demon was there to welcome me and everything—we had this torrid affair after that—claimed I was a hell of a kisser, it was good times.” Derek glared heatedly at him. “It didn’t last—maybe a decade at the most,” Stiles shrugged and grinned.

“Why are you telling me this?” Derek asked with a put upon sigh.

Stiles shrugged. “Sharing is caring, and all that crap,” he turned his face up to grin at Derek. “Now, what about you?”

“You don’t _become_ an angel,” Derek said with a quirked eyebrow.

“I _know_ _that_ ,” Stiles rolled his eyes dramatically. “Since you won’t share your creation—tell me how you came to be the angel in training watcher-person. Hey! You’re like Giles.”

Derek stared at him.

“That went right over your head. Okay. Why do you watch the baby angels?” he waited eagerly for an answer. Derek remained silent. “Come on! I shared _my_ story!” he waited again. Derek, again, remained silent. “Well, fine, be that way, I’ll just-,” he stopped and listened before sighing dramatically. “I must go—deals to make,” he stood and dusted off his pants with a grin at Derek. “I will get your stories, my fluffy, gray-winged, awesomely-eyebrowed angel.” He saluted and was gone before Derek could tell him to stop with the names.

If Derek rubbed a hand over his eyebrows, no one was there to see.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote two chapters today. I'll post the next one right after I do this one, but yeah, I realize I could have put them together, but whatevah

The frenzied feeling he had felt from all his brothers and sisters quieted, if only for a moment. He swung his gaze to his post, and stopped any and all verbal abuse towards Stiles, when he noticed who was with the demon.

Stiles grinned, showing his teeth as he leaned against Derek’s post. “You know, you’re lucky I like you,” he said conversationally. Derek swallowed, stepped forward and boxed Jackson into his arms with a worried look on his face. “Otherwise, I’d have let that small horde of demons hurt him.”

“Small horde?” Derek glared at him. His grip on Jackson tightened.

“Yes—seems a demon-friend,” he was referring to Lydia, “Lured him down to earth. Called some other demons in lower ranks to try take him hostage—angel in training and all, not as strong or competent as a fully trained angel—all that good stuff,” he shrugged and beamed at Jackson. “No offense.”

Jackson buried his face into Derek’s shirt and didn’t answer. Stiles shrugged his shoulders and grinned at Derek. “So, do I get a reward for returning a wayward Angel?”

“He is not wayward.”

“Right, that’s why you guys were in a frenzy over losing him.” Stiles rolled his eyes, stuffed his hands into his pockets and looked up at the gates with a bored expression. “I really must go—one good deed set me back at least a decade in my evil ways,” he winked at Derek, who just barely held back on rolling his eyes.

Jackson stepped away from Derek after Stiles had left. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t know she would…she wasn’t like other demons.”

Derek rubbed a hand over his face. “Trust me. I know what you mean.” He allowed Jackson to pass him, to go through the gates. Jackson’s wings twitched as Derek’s brushed against him.

He stared at the sky above and muttered, “ _What_?”

The next time his charge goes missing, he’s not to stay at his post. He has to go down to earth, and is in a small town. He’s looking around when he gets the first sense of his brother. He’s flying through the streets, through alleyways, and when he reaches said brother, he has to wonder why he didn’t just teleport. Ignoring that, he found his brother in his vessel, being talked to by a admittedly attractive female. He sniffed. At least she wasn’t a demon.

“Boyd.” He used his brother’s vessel’s name—they had agreed long ago to use their vessel’s names, rather than their true names. Derek had to wonder where his vessel was right now. Somewhere in the eastern United States, probably. Boyd looked at him with a frown on his face. “You cannot keep doing this!” he said.

The vessel blinked in confusion as his eyes settled on the girl in front of him. He looked around, nodded, and apologized before leaving.

Derek glared at his brother, who did not appear sorry at all. A moment later, they arrived at the gates. Stiles sat up, looking surprised but pleased. “I was wondering where you were!” he said brightly.

“Not now.” His face fell but he nodded and stood. Derek turned his glare back on Boyd. “As I was saying: you know how the generals feel about human-angel interactions, that don’t lie in the bounds of guarding them!”

Boyd huffed. “Is that above or below their feelings of consorting with a demon?” he retorted.

Derek’s jaw clenched. Stiles waved his arms around. “ _Hey_! I was human once!” He was ignored.

“I am not _consorting_ with a demon.”

“What do you call these dates, then?” he asked, glaring pointedly at him.

He stared at him, glanced in Stiles’ direction, and then shook his head. “Nothing.”

“Well, that hurts.” Stiles said before he was gone.

Boyd didn’t look happy about him leaving, but he stomped passed Derek nonetheless, through the gates and away from him.

Derek closed his eyes and mouthed, “ _What_?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omfg i'm so tired okay good night

Stiles hadn’t returned to the gates for some time—at least a decade in human years. He was definitely bored and definitely missing Derek’s dry humor.

The demons around him weren’t exactly…fun. They were, in the ‘I am so evil and I do evil things let us be evil together’ way, but the way he wanted was ‘hey, we are definitely bros, let us bro-fist and hang out and just be awesome together’. Not that he really got that from Derek—he had that with Lydia, and now a human named Peter—Derek’s was more ‘Talk until he has to reply because he has an awesome voice’. He was not above pining and moping over missing Derek’s voice.

When he appeared in front of the gates, he let himself bask in the warmth. When he looked towards Derek’s usual post, he was met with not Derek, but a different person. He knew this angel. He smiled in as friendly a manner as he could. “Isaac, how’s baby angel doing?” he asked brightly. Isaac pinked and looked pointedly away. “C’ _mon_!” Stiles draped himself over the podium, “How are you? It’s been what, a month?”

“A decade.”

“I didn’t know you kept track of human years!”

Isaac was not impressed. “What do you want?” he asked with a sigh.

“Derek’s sweet virgin ass, but if I can’t have that, I’ll take his presence.” Isaac stared at him, eyes wide. Stiles grinned.

Isaac cleared his throat. “He’s not here.”

“What do you mean he’s not here?” Stiles pouted dramatically.

“He’s not _here_.”

“Well where is he?”

Isaac sighed. “Earth—he’s got a job in watching over a child.”

“A…child.”

“Yes, a child, a kid—he’s probably there.”

“Why is he protecting a chi-.”

“I can’t tell you,” Isaac crinkled his nose. “You may find him in a town called Beacon Hills, though.”

Stiles grinned. “You.” He pointed at Isaac, “You are my new favourite.” He patted Isaac’s shoulder and left.

When he reached the aforementioned Beacon Hills, it didn’t take him long to find the angelic power source. He leaned against the tree nearest to the park, and waited. It did not take Derek long to notice him. It took Stiles a moment to collect himself over the _hotness_ of Derek’s vessel, however.

Derek twitched at the very obvious appreciative look Stiles gave him. He looked at the 7 year old, patted his head while saying something, and walked to Stiles. Stiles beamed at him. “Long time no-.” He didn’t get to finish, not when he was being punched. Stiles held his cheek, looking hurt. “See.” He rubbed his cheek and glared at the angel. “What the hell was that?” he asked.

“You disappear for a decade and then come back like nothing changed?” Derek replied angrily.

“Well, see, to me it was only a month—you know—hell being the way it is, though I think it might’ve been more than a month…maybe two, or three…I can’t be sure, but I know it wasn’t _that_ long, and let’s be real—it’s your fault anyways.”

“ _My_ fault? How is it _my fault_?”

“Our hanging out meant nothing to you!” Stiles waved his arms around. “What was I meant to take that as?”

“That wasn’t—I didn’t mean it like-.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Stiles waved his hand. “Your brother was being a dick because you dragged his feathery ass back home—I gets it.” He shrugged. “Whatever, let’s pretend it never happened, and hang out, or something? When’s this gig over anyways?”

Derek sighed. “Not for another decade.”

Stiles sagged dramatically against the tree. “Seriously? Should I just go back to hell for another couple of months? Because let’s be honest—it’s boring—almost as boring as heaven.”

“How could you possibly know if Heaven is boring?” Derek asked with a glare.

“All you do is roam around, protecting souls and the gates to heaven—how is that _not_ boring?” Stiles snorted. “At least in hell, you get like sex, and get to drink, and everything.”

Derek scoffed. “That does not sound fun.”

“Oh, if it’s with the right person, it is,” Stiles’ eyebrows rose with a grin. “I’ll be back, because it looks like your kid is talking to a stranger.”

“His name is Scott-,” Then what Stiles said sunk in, and Derek whipped around to find the kid talking to a little girl. 


	5. Chapter 5

Stiles stared at the little girl, completely aware of how creepy he was being. He continued staring until Derek and Scott showed up. Derek, bless his righteous soul, altered the memories of Scott’s family, making him Scott’s older cousin. Derek stepped beside him, smacked him on the back of the head and raised an eyebrow at him.

“She looks familiar…” he said with a frown. “Has this…glow about her…” he added lamely.

“That’s Allison.” Derek shifted and pursed his lips.

Stiles licked his lips, squinted against the sun and looked at Allison again. He stared extra hard. After a full five minutes of Stiles’ incomprehension, Derek sighed. “Allison was a sister—she fell.”

Stiles opened his mouth, closed it, and then opened his mouth again, “ _What_?”

“Shortly after you stopped visiting. She fell…rebelled; all that—doesn’t remember being an angel as no angel does when they fall. I—my older brother sent me to watch Scott, and Allison—she was _there_ already.” He watched the two interact. Watched Scott’s awkward limbs carry him after the girl. “They’re meant to be.” He said it a tad wistfully, and Stiles tilted his head to watch him. Derek coughed. “Anyways, she was a sister.”

Stiles nodded. “That’s why there’s a glow ‘bout her,” he said in conclusion. “Gotcha.” He grinned suddenly. “Should I introduce myself to Scott?” he asked cheerfully.

“And do what; tell him you can make his wildest dreams come true?”

Stiles made a face at Derek. “You need to let that go. He’s your charge! I wouldn’t deliberately do that to you.”

Derek regarded him before nodding slightly. “Just…no eye flashing, or…anything related to being a supernatural being, okay?” he pushed himself off the bench they were sitting on, and Stiles watched his hips sway as he walked. That was, until Derek caught him, and motioned him to follow. Stiles really needed to stop looking at him like that.

They walked up to Scott and Allison, and Derek cleared his throat. Scott looked up, his eyebrows rising at the pair. “Hey, Derek—you remember Allison,” he said with a smile. Allison gave the two of them her own shy smile.

“Uh, yeah, hi Allison.” Derek gave her a friendly smile. Stiles’ wasn’t as friendly—mostly because his smiles _couldn’t_ be friendly, not even if he tried his hardest. “Uh, this is my friend, Stiles—he’s visiting for a while.”

“Hi,” they chorused.

Allison perked up. “Are you boyfriends?” she asked sweetly. Derek choked on his spit, and Stiles’ smile grew to a grin. Before Stiles could confirm, Derek denied. Vehemently.

Stiles glared at him. “We’re working on that.” Stiles said firmly. Derek looked away from them. “So, what are you two doing?” he asked as he sat in the sand with them.

Allison shrugged. “I wanted to play tag, but Scott has asthma…so we’re pro’lly just gonna draw on the sidewalk…” she pointed to said sidewalk. “I brought chalk,” she added with a toothy grin.

“That’s awesome!” he grinned. “Want me to show you how to trap monsters?”

“ _Stiles_.”

“ _Derek_.” He motioned them to follow. “This will be a valuable life lesson, so listen and watch carefully, m’kay?”

“This is not a good idea.” Derek said with a growl.

“You know what’s not a good idea? Letting them go around without a hint of knowledge in making devil’s traps!” Stiles was already half way through finishing the sigil. “This helps trap monsters who look like people—they can’t get out once they’re in, and are at your mercy—no more monsters who can make you do things—or you can use salt—we hate—I mean— _monsters_ hate salt.” He crawled out of the trap and then finished it off.

Derek was glaring openly at him now. “I’m surprised you didn’t paint yourself into a corner.”

“First off—chalk. Second off—I’m not stupid!” Stiles rolled his eyes, but allowed Derek to drag him away from the two, who were admiring the ‘pretty circle’.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be here. Around them. Or me.” He looked back to the sigil on the ground and glared at Stiles. “They don’t know about the supernatural, and I’d like to keep it that way.”

Stiles pursed his lips together and nodded. “Fine. I’ll leave you guys alone.”

Derek opened his mouth, but stopped and allowed Stiles to storm off before he left.

Derek knelt at the edge, broke the circle and sat back to watch the kids draw their own designs. He let them until they grew bored, and Allison had to leave.

“Where’d Stiles go?” Scott asked as they walked home.

“He had to go.”

“Did you guys break up?”

Derek didn’t blush, shut up. “We weren’t dating.”

“Really?”

Sighing, and rolling his eyes, Derek nodded. “Really.”

“Huh, that’s weird.” Scott made a face. “It seemed like you were.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> really derek, them learning how to draw sigils isn't _that_ bad...


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh look it's getting closer to canon but not quite and what's THAT? A PLOT? WHAT?

Stiles was going to stay away. He was going to stay away from his sweet assed, gray winged, hot as sin angel. He really was. He was going to go ‘fuck it’ and forget about getting Derek, in all the ways.

He was so done.

Until he heard the rumor from some of his fellow demons, of a plan to take down Derek, his charge, and his charge’s _mate_ , which would definitely cause some sort of struggle with the werewolves of the world, and the humans. And hey, Stiles was all for destruction of the human race, and werewolves, but _Derek_ was in that struggle, apparently.

He went to the pearly gates, unsurprised to find not only Isaac there, but another. He waited until they noticed him. It took a lot longer than he thought, however, so he cleared his throat. Isaac was not impressed with him. He knows that look. Yes, another decade gone. What even? Stiles grinned, “So, why is Derek in a struggle with werewolf kind?” he asked politely. Isaac blanched. The other ducked his head with a scowl. “Isaac…” Stiles raised his eyebrows.

The other, he thinks is Boyd, but can’t be sure, grunts, “Derek is human.”

“ _What_?”

Isaac sighed, leaned against the podium and fixed Stiles with a stare. “He got too close to his human charge. Got too close to all of them, and was starting to feel humanity—we had to let him go.” Stiles opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, at a loss for words. “Instead of staying human, he was bitten by a werewolf, and then became an alpha.” Isaac licked his lips. “They are currently trying to survive against a family of hunters.”

Stiles nodded. “Okay.”

“You cannot interfere, Stile-.” Stiles had already left, ignoring the order. He was a demon; he didn’t need to listen to the angels, even if he was on semi-friendly terms with them.

Arriving in Beacon Hills, he looked around the dark woods. Ah, night time. He walked towards where he could feel non-human energy and found a burned down shell of a house. He looked around, let out a whistle, and waited. Moments later, he was faced with a red eyed Derek. He beamed at him. “Derek!” He held his arms out to his sides. “Red eyes—good look on you,” he added when Derek continued staring at him.

“Stiles.” Derek bit out. “How time flies,” he added sarcastically.

Stiles gave him a lopsided grin. “Sure does—how longs it been this time? A decade again?”

“Give or take.”

Stiles nodded. “So, I hear you’re in a power struggle,” he said, cutting to the chase.

Derek glared at him, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “There is no struggle.”

“That’s not what I heard!” Stiles said in a mocking singsong voice. Derek glared harder. “I heard something along the lines of alphas, and demons, and a war breaking out if you guys are killed.”

“Shouldn’t that be right up your alley?” Derek growled.

Stiles smiled, sauntered closer and circled Derek slowly, Derek following his every move. “Yes, but I figured if you were in it, then I should at least help, you know?” he traced his hand along Derek’s shoulders. “I am going to miss your wings, I can tell.”

Derek jerked his shoulders away with a scowl. “Stop that.”

Stiles smiled at him once more, nodded and patted his shoulder. “Maybe you should get Scott and Allison to brush up on their sigil making,” he winked. “Might be a great idea,” he added before leaving.

In hell, he found Lydia in her usual spot. As always, he fell down beside her, said, “If you just apologized to him, he’d go right back to you, you realize that, right?” and waited for her usual rebuttal.

Instead of the usual, “You know, if you said you were sorry for disappearing for a decade, he’d go right back to you, right?” she said, “No he won’t. And I don’t know any more about the alpha demons.”

Stiles fixed her with a shrewd look and sighed. “Well, what _do_ you know?”

“A lot more than you.”

Stiles snorted but waited. She sighed. “They recruited me. I didn’t take the position.”

“That’s great!”

“They also threatened me for not accepting.”

“That’s not so great…” Stiles made a face. “Want me to… _talk_ to them?”

“You don’t even know who ‘them’ is.”

“But you’ll tell me!” Stiles waved his arms about. “Who is it?”

Lydia made a face. “I’m not sure.” She looked to the side of her, followed the tracks of one such demon and sighed. “You should ask to be a part of those alphas they’re planning on taking over,” she added.

“Why would I do that?” Stiles’ eyebrows drew together in confusion.

Lydia fixed him with a stare, one that screamed ‘idiot’. “So that you can be in on it, and to help whomever it is you’re trying to save.”

Stiles nodded, “Ahhh…okay, I see what you’re saying now!” he snapped his fingers and stood. “As always, my sweet, it’s been good!” he bowed low and then left her on her perch. He found the demon circle easily enough—lesser demons eager to please him with information. “I want in,” he said simply when finding them, all huddled together.

The head of them, and lo and behold if it wasn’t his good friend Matt, stared at him. “Why?”

It was no secret that Stiles had a thing for an angel. He just hoped it wasn’t known fact that that angel was Derek. Who was now…a werewolf? “Why wouldn’t I?” he scoffed. “Bringing a war between monster and human, having that little added power of being an alpha? What could I possibly _not_ want out of that?” he asked. Matt didn’t look convinced. “I also have a grudge against the werewolf you’re trying to kill,” he said warily.

Matt looked to the other demons, who nodded slightly. After all, Stiles was one of the more higher ups in Hell—if he wanted in, who was to say no? They’d rather _not_ die via blade. “Fine.” Matt gave him a glare, but it wasn’t as intimidating as it could’ve been. “We’re attacking in a month human time.” He turned from Stiles after giving him the alpha who he was taking over.

Stiles looked at the sheet of paper, made a face at his new look, and left to scout out said Alpha. He was easy enough to find. In the forest with his pack, hunting. He watched them, watched how they were close. He left with a sick feeling in his stomach.

He ended up in front of Derek’s ‘house’. “Derek!” He called loftily, sitting on the rickety front porch. A growl that wasn’t from Derek sounded and he was on the ground under an older Scott. Stiles blinked, grinned, and in a flash Scott was sailing through the air. “Now, now, puppy—don’t want to be doing that to someone who could kill you without a thought,” he said with a reprimanding tone.

Scott fought against the hold but growled out. “Who are you?”

“I’m hurt that you don’t remember me!” Stiles said with a pout. Scott snarled. “Stiles, I’m Stiles.”

Scott stopped struggling, out of breath. “What?” he shook his head as best he could, and said, “ _Stiles_?”

“Yes, my little werewolf pup,” Stiles grinned, dropped his hand and effectively dropped Scott to the ground. “Now, where’s Derek?” he asked.

Scott made a face. “Probably with the newer wolves.” He made a face at that.

Stiles’ eyebrows rose. “Newer wolves?”

Scott sighed. “Yes. He bit them shortly after being turned into an alpha. He’s been training them a lot lately…won’t tell me why…” he trailed off and peered at Stiles. “Why don’t you look any older, how did you do that, and why are you here _now_?”

“Curious little pup, aren’t ya?” Stiles grinned at him. “What I’m about to say will _rock your world_ , so listen closely, m’kay?” He waited until Scott was staring at him. “Demons are real. Other monsters are real. That alpha pack Derek undoubtedly told you about,” he ignored Scott’s widened eyes. “Are going to be possessed by Demons.” He ignored Scott trying to interrupt him. “I will be a part of that group, but I will be trying to help you. Do not give my position away.” He pulled his blade from his jacket and looked down at it with a pensive look. “I want you to take this—I was going to give it to Derek, but he seems a bit…mad with power, right now. And he kind of hates me, so I don’t want him to try to kill _me_.”

“I…what’s going on?” Scott asked weakly, taking the blade and weighing it in his hands.

“There will be an alpha pack coming for you. They’re all going to be possessed by demons. They will be faster, stronger, and will be able to do what I just did. They will also be able to be killed with that blade there. I am going to be in the pack, as this guy,” he handed the paper to Scott. “I’m only helping you guys because of Derek.” Scott nodded. “Brush up on that sigil I showed you—it’ll help immensely.” He turned and walked away. “If you really can’t remember, look for Devil’s trap on Google.” He stopped just before he left. “Also, don’t let Derek know you have that blade—or know about Devil’s traps—he’s a stubborn ass right now and doesn’t believe me that demons are involved.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly have no idea what I'm doing, whoopsie doodle~  
> Also, wordy Stiles is wordy my god


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry for the long wait and the crappy quality and just agh I know it could be better ;-;  
> Stiles' meatsuit: http://iwanttobecalledcupcake.tumblr.com/post/31345778687

Scott stared at the paper Stiles had left him, hefted the blade up to stare at it and its intricate design. He dropped it to his side and stared at the paper once more. The Alpha Stiles was going to be possessing was _huge_ if the stats that were beside his picture was anything to go by.

He stared at the picture again, sighed, and stood. Might as well go home. Derek wasn’t going to show up any time before his curfew.

**-0-0-**

Stiles’ first warning didn’t sink in. Maybe his second one would. “Just listen, you ass!” he waved his arms around as Derek prepared for the day. “You only have just over three weeks of human time left! The Alphas—who _are_ demons—are going to attack! You need to get your pack to barricade the house, to learn sigils—all those things!”

Derek rounded on him, pressing him against the charred wall behind him. “Why are you even _here_?”

“Oh, my god!” Stiles dropped his head back in exasperation. “When you were stripped of your grace, did they take your common sense and appreciation for help, too?” he asked with a whine. Derek pressed him into the wall even more. He heard the wood splinter.

He’s rather thankful he isn’t human.

“Fine, I’m going,” he glared once more at Derek before he was gone. He rolled his shoulders as he heard Derek yell at him and hit a wall inside the house. He made a face and went to Scott.

Scott, thankfully, was more willing to listen. “So, just over three weeks and we attack,” he said, causing Scott to let out a yelp and fall out of his desk chair as he tried turning quickly. Stiles grinned to himself.

“What?”

“Yeah, three weeks. I’ve tried telling Derek, but he’s a stubborn mule. You’ll have to go to the house in the woods and draw sigils at every doorway, and on the ceiling, and definitely salt every entryway there is—cracks in the wall included.”

“Why salt?” Scott gave him a confused look.

“Us demons can’t cross salt lines. It’s a purity thing.” He shrugged. “You guys—though werewolves—can.”

Scott nodded slightly. “What do I tell Derek?”

“That’s the beauty. Don’t.” Stiles grinned at him and sauntered forward. He took Scott’s notebook, a pen, and drew the sigil with instructions written beside it. “Draw these as big as you can, in random spots of the house—use black spray paint, or gray, since that won’t show up very well against the charred wood.”

Scott nodded obediently. “How don’t I let Derek know?”

“Do it when he’s not around—you said he was busy training his new pups.” Stiles handed him the notebook back. “And talk to your huntress girlfriend, maybe she’ll be able to talk her family into helping with the Alpha pack.” He waved and left.

**-0-0-**

Stiles shifted around, his meat suit felt too big and too small, all at once. He made a face as he twitched. The enhanced senses were screwing with him. The smells—he did not need to know that he smelled like rotten eggs and death to werewolves, thanks.

Looking at his hands, he admired them. They were strong, and big. He grinned to himself and pulled the front of his jeans out. The sight pleased him. He let out a snicker. Not that he was small, by any means, but it was nice to know his meat suit was well endowed. He continued assessing the body. Hands running down hard muscle, over abs. He shivered and grinned. Running hands through rather unruly hair, he shrugged. His hair was the least of his worries. The scruff was another thing.

Would he look better without it? Rubbing along his jaw—it was a fantastic jaw—he decided no, he would keep the scruff. He traced a finger over his eyebrows as he walked away from his body’s pack, and briefly wondered if all werewolves had incredible eyebrows. Rude.

They would be fine without their leader for a few days.

At least he hopes it didn’t take more than a few days.

Having this body was great—it was like being on temporary vacation, really, he wasn’t complaining—but he knew werewolves, knew how they would all be restless and more likely to attack a hunter, or a human, without their alpha. He heard the constant screaming and yelling from the alpha; could see his struggling against binds that his own mind conjured.

“Don’t worry, Alpha—I’ll try to keep you alive.” He nodded to himself. “I swear—I just need to help my friend.”

The screaming didn’t stop, but at least he wasn’t being cursed out any longer. He appeared into the woods again, looking around himself at the others. The only female was standing to his left. That was Matt. He grinned at him. “Matt, babe, how’s the bod?”

“Fuck off.”

Stiles grinned to himself. He flexed his muscles. “I’m doing fantastic,” he said.

“Shut up.”

“No, this is-.”

“We’re planning an ambush, you _idiot_ ,” Matt hissed.

“Riiiiight, sorry,” Stiles mockingly mimed zipping his lips.

Matt rolled his eyes and walked through the underbrush, towards the house. The circled it, all keeping low to the ground and shifting. All they were doing, at the moment, was reconnaissance. Getting the lay of the land, all that. Once they looked around the empty house, they left.

“You realize we just gave away our scents, right?” Stiles asked as they appeared in hell again.

“Shut up.” Matt walked away after giving them a brief reminder of the date and time.

**-0-**

Stiles looked up at the house, its charred remains, and had to wonder how that happened. He looked down at himself and hummed thoughtfully. It was only a moment later when Derek was there, growling at him.

“Sup, angel-face?” Stiles asked. He was not used to this voice.

Derek glared at him. “Stiles.”

Stiles grinned. “Yup,” he popped the ‘p’. “Now, how bout letting me in?” he walked along the dirt path, passed Derek, and into the house. He had to remind himself that Scott probably at least attempted to barricade the house. He used his nose and skirted around the randomly placed sigils.

“What do you want?” Derek grunted.

Stiles turned and had to smirk because he was bigger than Derek now. “Now, Derek, I’ve tried to warn you twice now,” he said with a finger wag. “Each time you’ve brushed it off as me trying to make trouble. I’m very obviously not,” he gestured down to himself.

“He’s an alpha.”

“Yes!” Stiles threw his arms up with a grin. “Yes, he is—I am…you know what I meant.” He waved Derek off. “The point _is_ that I’m an Alpha right now—stronger, faster, etcetera,” he grinned, “And I’ve got the nifty powers of being a demon, still.”

Derek paled but clenched his jaw and raised his chin. “What are you saying?”

“Oh, my god.” Stiles rubbed at his face. “Please, you are not just a pretty face, Derek!” he took Derek’s shoulders and shook him slightly. “Here, I’ll help you put two and two together,” he squeezed Derek’s shoulders lightly. “I told you that an alpha pack, which is being possessed by demons, is going to attack in about 3 weeks—just less than that, to be honest.”

“And you still want me to barricade this house.”

“Uh…yes.” Stiles nodded his head. “Either that, or go find somewhere that you could actually barricade, because this house is pretty much a death trap in itself.” He did notice Derek’s wince, but ignored it. “Got it? I can’t be around you too much…” he trailed off. “I’ll try to sneak away to text you, because yes I do have a cellphone, their plans, alright?”

Derek nodded slightly. He was trying very hard not to breathe. Stiles, against his better judgment, leaned forward and sniffed. “I really wish I could keep this body, to be honest—you smell amazing.” Derek audibly swallowed. Stiles smiled and was gone.

Derek sagged against the wall nearest to him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There be smut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was assured by Ray that the ending isn't horrible and kind of in character, so gr9! Also, I do tend to just...throw out what people believe heaven and rules are and yeah, it's all a garbled mess of views so gr9 about that too? IDK enjoy!

Derek felt like shit, marring the already charred walls further, when writing the sigils. He finishes the final one for the front door and has to sit against one of the walls to stop any and all forms of anger. The family who lived here—the ones who were his vessel’s family before a fire took them—their house was being desecrated because a group of demons wanted to start a war. It angered him. He, for once since it first happened, wished he was still an angel and could smite the bastards for even thinking of trying to go through with their plans.

His chest is heaving, and he knows if anyone—anyone at all—came in, they’d see him ready to rip a few throats out. He breathes deeply to calm himself down, before the scent—the very familiar scent—hits his nose. “Stiles.”

He’s out the door before Stiles can even think of trying to find a way in. He’s still in that damned Alphas body. Derek instinctually feels his defenses rise. “What do you want?” he snaps.

“Whoa there, big guy,” Stiles raised his hands in surrender. “Just came to see if you took my advice this time,” he shrugs and moves closer, despite the warning growl Derek gives. He backs up every step Stiles takes towards him, until he can feel the wood of the front steps’ rails dig into his back. Stiles smiles fiendishly as he leans forward again. Derek can feel his breath puff against his face and tries to hold his breath.

“You still smell amazing, you know,” Stiles said breathlessly. He’s smelling along Derek’s jaw, nosing the stubble and along the shell of his ear, and Derek can hear Stiles’ heart—the too quick tempo beating a headache into his head.

“Yeah, well, you don’t.”

Stiles merely chuckles as his tongue sticks out and he licks a small strip of skin, from Adam’s apple to ear. Derek jerks away, promptly hitting his head against the railing. He glares as Stiles steps back and grins with a wink. “I gotta go.”

Derek openly curses Stiles’ existence.

**-0-**

 

Scott shows him the blade. Derek has to breathe to not break Scott’s arm for not showing him sooner. “This could have been a game changer!”

“What do you mean _could have_?” Scott waves the blade around with a pout. “I showed it to you before the fight, or whatever!” He lets the blade drop to his side. “Besides, you’re never around, why should I have told you?” He puts it back safely into his jacket and stomps out of the house.

“He’s right, you know.”

Derek twitches but turns to glare at Stiles. “What do you want?”

“Like I said, besides your ass, not much.” Stiles shrugs his shoulders and Derek feels himself twitch. It wouldn’t be hard for Stiles to overpower him now that he isn’t an angel. He breathes through his nose and it twitches again as he catches Stiles’ blatant arousal.

He is about to stomp from the house before remembering that _Stiles entered the house_. “How’d you get in?” he demands and Stiles grinned at his anger. The asshole.

“You’ve got a crack—miniscule as it is—in this wall here,” he moves to the wall nearest Derek, pushes the ex-angel onto his knees and his head down to see the barest of cracks. Derek can feel his muscles tensing as Stiles manhandles him down, how powerless he really is against the demon’s strength that’s now mixed with an alphas, and he’s left there with a confusing, and disturbing, boner.

Stiles doesn’t comment, and leaves.

He doesn’t know what to think of that.

**-0-**

 

The next time Stiles arrives; Derek’s salted the entire house, and made sure that it was protected against animals looking for a good salt lick. Stiles is grinning in a predatory manner as he circles the barrier. “Good job.” He’s watching Derek the entire time. Derek’s pack is behind him, growling.

“Aw, pups wanting to protect dear Derek’s virtue? How sweet,” Stiles’ eyes flash black but he doesn’t do anything to harm them, and for that Derek is grateful.

“What do you want?”

“A bit of foreplay, but meeting your family is a great substitute.”

Derek flinches but turns to the wolves in back of him. Scott’s the only one not growling, but he’s not surprised. “This is Stiles—he’s a demon, but he’s _on our side_.” He says it firmly.

Stiles waves and grins. “Ah, nice to meet you. I’m only helping because Derek’s ass is on the line, and really—I’ve never even had a taste yet, and that’s a shame, so I’ve basically got to stake my claim and all that-.”

“Stop. Talking.” Derek can feel his face burning and hopes none of the pack can tell. His hopes aren’t too high.

Stiles shrugged. “I’m actually here to see if you’ve trained them in how _not_ to be obvious when trying to trap a demon. You know the basics—not glancing at the sigil for too long or often, to keep the demon talking because demons love the sound of their own voices, to be honest, and to make sure the circle is not broken anywhere?” Stiles licked his lips and smirked. “Don’t want to be shown your error, am I right, Derek?”

Derek growled, more out of embarrassment than anger. “Leave.”

Stiles shrugged again and blew him a kiss as he left. Derek ignored the questions from the pack and left the circle for a run.

He wasn’t surprised when Stiles was running beside him moments later, nor was he surprised when he was suddenly not running and was pressed against a tree. He huffed as he tried to breathe.

Stiles smiled at him, hands fluttering as they ran along his chest and stomach. “You know, Derek, in this body, I can smell a hell of a lot of things,” he said softly. Derek glared at him. “Arousal, for one,” he rolled the ‘r’ sound.

Derek sucked in a breath and refused to speak as Stiles’ hands ran along his sides, down to his hips and then _pressed_ with just this side of pleasurable pain. Derek cringed and gripped the tree behind him. He could feel it splinter in his hands.

Stiles smiled, licked his lips very deliberately and left.

He _left._

“Goddamnit.”

 

**-0-**

Stiles almost doesn’t hear in time. He’s sitting with Lydia again. She’s looking a tad worse for wear. “I mean it, Lyds—say sorry.”

“Shut up, Stiles.”

He shrugs and plays with a loose thread from the shirt he’s wearing. A demon—he’ll call this demon Stan because he looks like a Stan—stumbles in front of him and bows his head slightly. “I’ve come with news.” He looks earnest and Stiles would’ve fallen for the look, had they not been in hell.

“Speak.” Lydia barely holds back a snort at his pseudo-command.

“The demons—the alpha-possessing demons—are changing their attack time for two days human time from now.”

Stiles’ eyebrows rise at that but he nods once. “Thank you.” He stands and Stan the Demon shrinks back but remains bowed.

“You can leave.” Lydia says and has to glare at Stiles for the look he gives her. She so has a heart. A dark, shriveled heart, but a heart nonetheless.

**-0-**

 

The next time Stiles appears, it’s outside of the Sheriff’s house. The Sheriff, who looks an awful lot like his father way back when, when he was still alive. Stiles feels himself twitch at that. Can feel a restlessness overcome him. Derek is watching him as they sit outside the Sheriff’s house.

“That’s your dad, you know.” Derek makes a face, as if he wasn’t supposed to say.

“ _What_?”

“Reincarnation is real.” Derek licked his lips and shrugged. “He knows about the fight coming for us…that’s why I’m here. He—the Hales were werewolves, as you know—he knew them and their secret…helped with the law if any hunters went rogue.”

Stiles stares at the house, at the police cruiser and then nods. “Huh…” he frowns but nods again slightly after a long moment of silence. “Let’s go somewhere.” He taps his finger along Derek’s car’s dash, starting it.

Derek drives them until they’re in front of the old Hale house. They stare at it and say nothing. Stiles scrubs a hand over his face. “So, the attack is in two days—they thought not telling me the change of plans would be a better plan of attack, or something…” he opens the door to stretch his legs and sighs happily as he leaves the car. “Helps being a higher up demon,” he adds when the silence engulfs them again.

Derek steps around the car carefully, each step deliberate as he comes to stand in front of Stiles, in front of the Alpha’s body. His entire being is telling him to not do this—not while Stiles isn’t Stiles, but another part is telling him to just take. Take and take and take. Stiles is watching him, a quirk of his lips that could come off as amused in any other situation—it just looked smug. Derek took a breath and dropped to his knees. His hands fumbled with Stiles’ belt.

Stiles smirked as he helped Derek undo the belt, unbutton the jeans and then lower the zipper slowly. So achingly slow, each of the teeth pulling and the sound echoing around the clearing. “I didn’t even have to do the whole ‘end of the world’ speech.” He comments idly as Derek breathes him in.

“Shut up.” Derek’s hands are shaking and he can feel himself blushing and feels like a damned fool for it. “Just shut up.”

Stiles smiles and nods his head as he waits. It feels like an eternity of Derek’s damp breath against his cock, where he’s hard and waiting for Derek to move, to give him any type of contact. He feels his resolve crumble until Derek’s mouth is dry and awkward against the head of his dick.

He lets out a whine of frustration and pushes Derek back awkwardly.

“Derek.”

“No, I can do this—just gimme-,” Derek makes an aborted movement and lets out his own grumble as he runs a hand through his hair.

Stiles pulls him up, swivels them so Derek’s the one leaning against the Camero, and drops to his knees. He pulls at Derek’s belt, at the button and zipper and rids Derek of his jeans easily. He makes a show of pulling Derek’s underwear down, of licking his lips, and locking eyes with Derek as he swallows him down.

Derek curls around Stiles’ head, his fingers growing claws and gripping at his hair. His breathing is choked as Stiles’ tongue drags along his shaft, along the vein and to the head of his cock. He’s breathing heavily, trying to regain control as Stiles lifts one of his legs and throws it over his shoulder. He whimpers when Stiles’ fingers find his mouth and Stiles’ voice growls out an order to, “Suck.” He starts sucking on them greedily, as Stiles picks his other leg up and throws it over his other shoulder.

Derek’s hands scrabble backwards to find some stability as he no longer has the use of his legs. Stiles stands slowly, his mouth never leaving Derek’s dick as he drops Derek onto the hood of his car. His fingers are tangled in Stiles’ hair and he has to remind himself to let go once in a while.

Derek’s breathing heavily and makes a noise as Stiles retracts his fingers from his mouth. He goes rigid as Stiles’ finger runs along the cleft of his ass and slowly circles his entrance. His breathing stutters as Stiles slowly presses in just the tip of his finger.

“Pants. Pants, Stiles, _pants_!”

Stiles pulls back and gives Derek a raised eyebrow but goes to dig in his pants and returns with a condom and packet of lube. “You just walk around with these?” he asks. He’s clearly judging Derek, which is no fair, considering _demon_.

“No.” Derek’s face heats up again. He glares at Stiles as Stiles uses some of the lube and coats his fingers as he waits for Derek to continue talking. “I was planning this, okay?” he clenches his jaw and growls. “I might die.”

“Not on my watch.”

“Even on your watch, something could go wrong.” Derek rolls his eyes as Stiles returns his fingers and mouth to Derek’s anatomy. He drops his head back with a thunk. “I did not want to die a virgin.” He knows his vessel is far from being a virgin, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t, personally.

Stiles nods as he continues bobbing his head. Derek grunts when Stiles gets his first finger in him, then his second and he’s slowly coming undone as Stiles’ fingers stretch him open. The low burning in his stomach, the tingle in his spine and the breathlessness tell him he’s extremely close. He can smell everything, as if his senses were heightened and he can smell Stiles’ arousal, like a blanket that coats him. He groans loudly as he moves against Stiles’ fingers. “Fuck, Stiles, I’m-.”

“I…” Stiles voice is garbled, but he pulls off with a pop, “Know,” his fingers are moving inside of him, faster now, but more exploratory, rubbing along his walls until they find it—the bundle of nerves and Derek’s coming with a shout, with his hands now above him to try to find purchase—his claws scraping the paint of his car. He’ll find it in himself to care when he’s not blissed out on endorphins.

Stiles keeps his fingers in him, adds another and continues his ministrations. Derek whines low in his throat as Stiles stretches him out more, stretches him with four fingers and continues to brush against his prostate. He tries to push Stiles away, but it’s weak and he doesn’t have the energy to do so. His arms feel like rubber, and all he can smell is himself and the forest around him.

He hears the condom wrapper being ripped open and hears Stiles grit his teeth as he rolls the rubber along himself. Derek only feels a little bad that Stiles is as hard as he is. He feels his dick twitch in interest at the thought. At the image his mind conjures of being fucked and filled. He groans with the thought. Stiles positions himself and enters him with one long, hard thrust. Derek nearly sobs, the sound choking off in his throat, because he’s still sensitive to the touch.

Stiles pulls him up, holds him around the waist and behind his shoulders. He kisses Derek, long and filthy before he starts moving. Stiles kisses along his jaw, down to his neck and along his shoulders as he pushes into him with shallow thrusts. He is pulled away from the hood of his car and clutches at Stiles’ shoulders.

He’s inexplicably turned on by the fact that Stiles can hold him up easily, can grip his waist in a painful hold and pull Derek against him to thrust deep and hard. Stiles is letting out a litany of words, words that stumble with each thrust. Derek’s close, he knows, but Stiles is close as well, he can feel the stuttering in Stiles’ thrusts.

“Fuck, fuckfuckfuckfuck,” Derek pulls himself until they’re chest to chest, and he can grip Stiles’ long hair as tight as he wishes. Stiles bites his shoulder—not hard enough to break skin, but hard enough that there will be a bruise—and comes, growling as he pounds into Derek. He’s sure he has a pain kink, because he’s coming again, hard, between their stomachs.

Stiles pants against his neck and slowly pulls out. Derek hisses but stands—while heavily leaning against his car for support—when Stiles puts him down. They don’t speak as Stiles takes the condom off and ties it, nor when they dress themselves.

They stare at one another when they’re presentable again and Stiles nods his head slightly. “I’ll see you in two days.” His eyes flash black and Derek has to remember that yeah, Stiles is a demon. Stiles grins at him and then he’s gone.

Derek has a small sense of regret, but then he remembers the years of pining he’s done, and his feelings for Stiles. Even if Stiles wasn’t in love with him. He can already feel the wrong feelings coming on, and hates that Stiles could do that to him.

He needs to run.

So he does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This should be the second to last chapter--the next is the fight and aftermath of said fight.
> 
>  
> 
> I do want to explore more of the other's relationships, too, though. Lydia and Jackson, for example, and Berica (now that Erica's a werewolf, how would that effect them?) and yeah, Scallison, too, because they're not like, together-together in the ending of this fic and I want to know why and I know it's ridic that I don't know because I'm the writer but jfc get off my back plz
> 
> So yeah, that's why I made it a series--I don't even know when I'll get the other parts out, though, so please don't hold your breath ~~I REALLY WANT TO SEE THE JYDIA STORY THOUGH SO IDK~~


	9. Chapter 9

Stiles is in heaven. Well not _in_ heaven. He doesn’t think demons could be redeemed, no matter how noble their causes were in the beginning, and go to heaven. But he’s at the gates. He’s still in the Alpha’s body, and the alpha for once, is quiet. Probably in awe of the pearly gates. He knows he would be, if he hadn’t already seen them repeatedly for the numerous years he has.

He beams at Isaac and leans against the podium. “Isaac, my little baby angel, how are _you_?” he asked as he reached forward and played with a lock of Isaac’s curls.

Isaac pulled his hair away and glared. “I’m fine.”

Stiles beamed. “Yeah, I can see that. Haven’t gotten rid of that pesky virginity yet, have you?” He grinned at Isaac’s flush. “That’d definitely loosen you up, methinks,” he added.

“Go away before I smite you.”

“Derek’s never answered that for me and I’m far too lazy to Google it, but it is smited, or smote?” Stiles asked innocently.

“Smote, which you will be if you don’t leave soon,” Isaac replied evenly.

“Ooh, angels got some _bite_ ,” Stiles raised his eyebrows in jest as he took a step back, and then another. “I just came to tell you that the alpha demons attack in two days time, if you or your fellow angels were wondering,” he winks and then is gone within a blink.

**-0-**

 

He’s sitting in Scott’s room when the kid shows up. He only smiles a little bit when said kid screeches and falls over in shock. Bit dramatic, but what goods being a demon if his presence wasn’t scream worthy?

“Why do you smell like Derek?” he asked from the floor before he was getting up to stand. Stiles glared at him slightly. “Like…a lot…a lot _a lot_ ,” he added.

“Because, we had sex.”

“Gross!”

“Shut up, Scott.”

“But you had sex with my Alpha—that’s like…like…having sex with my _brother_ or something,” Scott shuddered as he dropped his bag onto his bed. “Totally gross,” he reiterated as he started pulling at his sweater.

“Scott, m’boy,” Stiles said brightly as he stood from the chair he was occupying. “Two days, lad, two days.” He doesn’t know why he’s sounding like an old person, but hey, he’s older than any old person he knows of, so he gets a pass, he thinks.

“What? We _don’t have more time_?!” Scott grips at his hair, “I thought we had at least another week! I haven’t even finished putting random devil’s traps around the front of Derek’s house!” He whines as he grabs a bag Stiles didn’t notice and goes for his window.

“Why are you going to your window?”

“My mom’s downstairs.”

“Why didn’t she come when you screamed?”

“I didn’t scream _loudly_ …” he glared at Stiles, but he really resembled a puppy, so Stiles wasn’t too intimidated. “Probably thought I was playing a game, or something…” he added under his breath as he jumped from the sill to the ground. Stiles followed him and walked with him till he reached Scott’s bike.

“I’ll just…meet you there…” Stiles lifted his hand in farewell and was gone before Scott could say anything.

He twitched when he appeared outside of Derek’s ‘house’. He looked around himself and nodded as he started moving around circles and spray paint he could smell, up until he was against the salted line. “Derek!” He called, dragging out both e’s and making his way away from the house. He waited and was not disappointed as Derek emerged from the tree line.

“What do you want?” Derek growled.

“Wow, is that any way to treat a guy who just fucked you silly?” Stiles asked and he could practically _see_ Derek turn red. He wasn’t going to gloat, though. “Scott will be here in a bit, to finish putting down devil’s traps.”

“You and Scott are buddies now?”

“You’re exuding some pretty smelly jealousy right now, Derek, I’d rein that shit in,” Stiles replied with a huff. “And yes, Scott and I are sort of-somewhat buddies—the kid’s a good kid.”

Derek snorted but Stiles wasn’t focusing on that, he was focusing on the fact that two people, simultaneously, tackled him into a circle he was teetering on the edge of. He lay there, staring at the canopy of leaves above him while he waited for the two werewolves to get off of him. They were Derek’s pack, he wouldn’t hurt them. Even if he’s hurt people for far less.

“Are you okay?” the girl asked.

He glanced up and seen a mane of blond curls and had to roll his eyes. ‘Fucking _puppies_ ,’ the thought came from the Alpha, and not Stiles. Stiles agreed wholeheartedly, however.

“Yes, Erica, I am fine.” Derek’s voice was clipped and Stiles sat up while shifting about in the small circle. It really wasn’t that big. Maybe two feet diameter, at the most. As he stood, he felt the effects and sighed.

“Can someone break this?” he asked as he stuffed his hands into his pockets.

“No way!”

He glared his hardest at the boy.

It was another five minutes, as silence passed, that Scott finally arrived with Allison in her parent’s vehicle. “What the hell?” he asked as he jumped out of the SUV.

“I thought you guys were broken up,” Erica sneered.

Scott ignored her; Allison just gave her a tight smile and said, “We are.”

“Scott, my main bro, help a demon out, will ya? These two jerk-faces won’t, and Derek’s being an asshole!” Stiles whined. Allison quirked an eyebrow at him. “Sup?” he asked with a head nod.

“That’s Stiles—remember the dude who showed us how to do devil’s traps when we were kids?” Scott said as he walked forward.

“Wasn’t he a skinny boy with a buzz cut when we saw him?” Allison asked with a barely concealed smile.

“Yeah, but demon, remember?” Scott bent down and broke the circle, allowing Stiles to leave said circle, before fixing it again. “Possessed his own alpha to help Derek from the inside—he’s like a double spy!”

“Interesting.” Allison walked around him in a circle. “Why?”

“So I could tap dat sweet ass,” Stiles replied bluntly, jerking a thumb to Derek.

“Scott said you accomplished that already, why are you still here?” Allison asked.

Derek made a noise. “You _told_ Scott?” he exclaimed.

“Scott and I are bros!” Stiles grinned. “Plus he smelled you on me. I couldn’t lie to-.”

“You’re a _demon_! Lying is what you guys _do_!” the boy said incredulously.

“Shut up, Danny, Stiles is my bro,” Scott said, standing besides Stiles in camaraderie. Stiles beamed at him in response.

Derek made a noise again and shook his head. “Whatever. Just do what you’re here to do, and leave.” He stalked back to the house and left the five there.

Stiles looked at the two wolves that were hovering. “So what’s your guys’ game plan?” he asked as Scott went about spraying the ground, Allison copying his actions. “Did Derek at least tell you _how_ to exorcise a demon? The Latin you need to know? Anything ringing any bells?”

Danny rolled his eyes. “I know the Latin; she knows how to talk them into following her until they’re trapped.”

“Ah, lure and kill, my favourite thing to avoid when going against hunters, very ineffective to the smarter demons, but hey—we’re dealing with general idiots. Matt being the exception.”

“What do we do about Matt, then?” Allison asked from across the clearing.

“He’ll need to be killed with the knife,” Stiles shrugged. “I’d volunteer to do it myself, but Derek’s feeling less than friendly towards me right now and might end up exorcising me himself.” He shifted from foot to foot and then shrugged. “I’m hoping you won’t be here when they attack, Allison—werewolves and demons can heal fine, but humans can’t.”

“Oh, I’ll be here.”

“Fuck.” Stiles sighed dramatically but stuffed his hands into his pockets nonetheless. “Well, if I’m judging character right, and I hope I am, then there should be someone who could heal you, if you need it…” he trailed off and looked towards the house. “I should go before Derek decides he’s tired of me…” he shrugged and left.

Allison looked towards the house and raised an eyebrow at the red eyes glowing back. “You’re being a baby!” she called. The three wolves cringed at the growl she received.

 

**-0-**

 

Two days. Two days, 4 hours, and 18 minutes to be exact. But who’s counting?

Stiles scratched at the scruff on his cheek as the other alphas wait around him.

“Why do you smell funny?”

“What?” Stiles gave Matt a confused look. “If you didn’t notice, we all smell funny, thank you very much.”

Matt rolled his eyes but nods to the others nonetheless. “I’m…glad…that word got to you about the time change,” he said before they left. They all knew Stiles could hear the lie.

Stiles gave him a toothy grin. “Wouldn’t miss this for the world.” They were in front of the house within the second.

Right away, one of the demons was letting out roars from being trapped. Matt and the other two unknown demons started stumbling through the maze of traps and salt lines. Stiles stood still as he watched the other wolves appear from inside the house.

He whipped around at the sound of wings and stared at Jackson, who was behind Lydia. He beamed at the sight of them. Walking to them he explained quickly that while they fought or at least pushed the demons into traps, that Jackson was to protect Allison. He and Lydia would have to leave before Danny started exorcising the demons.

The fight was bloody and brutal. He watched as Erica was thrown into the house’s porch with a deep red soaking her shirt, and Scott as he tackled a demon into a circle, only to have his throat slashed. “Thank god for healing abilities, right?” Stiles muttered to Lydia, only to find that she was helping Derek wrestle the last demon into a trap.

Danny started his chant of Latin, which immediately started affecting the other demons as well. He twitched.

Matt was the only one left. He was twitching as he tried to leave the clearing. Scott threw the knife to Stiles and he jumped over traps and away from salt lines to drive the knife through Matt’s back.

Matt’s eyes turned black before a black cloud exploded from the female Alpha’s mouth. She slumped against him but he dropped her after pulling the knife from her and leaving his own Alphas body before he was properly exorcised, Lydia followed him.

Crawling out of hell was never fun when you’ve been exorcised.

They sat on the Sheriff’s steps, because no one was home and he needed somewhere to be. Lydia was slumped against him. “Well, that was…kind of anticlimactic,” she said.

“It really was, wasn’t it?” She nodded. “I mean, I thought it would’ve been more…there should have been more gore, right?” Once again, she nodded. “I guess if you factor in anal-retentive planning werewolves, ex-angels, and double-crossing demons then the fight wasn’t really fair, eh?” he snorted.

“Guess so.” Lydia said with a yawn.

“So, Lyds…I couldn’t help but notice-.”

“Shut your face.”

Stiles grinned. “Jackson forgive you, then?”

“Not really.”

“Same boat as you, love—Derek’s being a right old ass, even after I tapped dat ass…you’d think he’d be more nice to me, right?”

“Maybe you did something?”

“What?!” Stiles gave her the most offended look he could muster. “What would I have done?”

“You always do _something_ ,” she replied. “What, did you just hump it and dump it?” she asked.

“No! I had to go see Scott after we had sex, so I—oh.”

“You left right after and didn’t even give him any reason to think you were serious, didn’t you?”

His silence spoke volumes. “I should go explain, shouldn’t I?”

“Probably.”

“Hey!” Stiles stood and grinned. “Maybe we could have some celebratory sex after!”

“Highly doubtful. Maybe some celebratory cuddles would be better for his poor psyche,” Lydia advised.

“What poor psyche?”

She gave him a raised eyebrow, stood and dusted her skirt off. “He has to deal with you.”

“I’m offended.” Stiles said with his hand holding where his heart was, or used to be—he’s not sure if he still has one, really. She gave his cheek a peck and smiled before leaving him. He looked towards the sky and sighed. It was barely even midnight. He thought they’d be fighting for days.

He probably should thank Scott somehow, for thinking of littering the property with devil’s traps and salt lines. Except when he’s standing in front of Derek’s house, and there are still traps littering said property and he’s stuck in one. “Little help here?” he called to the house.

Danny’s the one who greets him, a bit loftily and not as frightened as anyone should be when meeting a demon. “Derek’s not here.”

“Where is he?”

“I don’t know—he ran off…” he trailed off and sniffed the air. “Never mind, he’s coming back.”

“Good to know.” He stepped out of the circle as soon as Danny dug up the bit of earth that had the spray paint on it. “Thanks.” Danny shrugged before waving to Derek, who had emerged from the foliage a moment before, before traipsing back into the house. Stiles smiled at Derek, “Any casualties?”

“No, but the Alpha you possessed had some choice words for the two of us,” Derek replied as he stepped forward.

“Ah, about us having sex while he was in there?” Stiles didn’t bother trying to hide a grin.

Derek rolled his eyes. “Yes.”

Stiles nodded and then sighed in good humor. “Listen, about that-.”

“I know. It didn’t mean anything to you, it didn’t mean anything to me, either.” Derek’s poker face was impressive, Stiles thought.

“Bullshit.” Stiles backed Derek back into a tree and gave him a smile. “It meant a lot to me, thanks.” He reached down and took Derek’s hand in his, kissing the back of it. “I mean, why would I visit you so often when you were guarding the gates? And why would I come back, even after the blatant rejections on your part?” Stiles asked with a quirked eyebrow. “I’m fucking… _besotted_ with you, dude. If I had a heart, it’d race whenever you were near, if I were still human, I’d be a nervous wreck around you—I’d probably ramble more than I already do, and the want would be so blatant that you’d probably get sick of the smell-.”

“Never.”

Stiles smiled as he dropped his head onto Derek’s shoulder. “We’re so fucking sappy right now.”

Derek smiled to himself and nodded. “Yeah, it’s kind of pathetic.” Stiles snorted. “At least we aren’t acting like Scott when he and Allison were dating.”

“I don’t envy you for having to be around Scott all the time,” Stiles said with a resolute nod. “We may be bros now, but he’s such a teenager.”

Derek was sarcastic as he said, “So glad we both skipped that stage in life.” Stiles pulled away to beam at him in response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello shit endings that I know so well
> 
> I know guise, I know!
> 
> If you want a better ending, you can ask for it...and I'll try to write another chapter, or at least a better ending for this =S I mean, I'll keep the ending I have but add a bit more and add another chapter? Idk but yeah, you can totes demand one from my sorry ass


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